mothers of invention: gretchen
[just two days left to enter “the billboard bag,” giveaway on saturday’s post. you can head on over there after you’re inspired by the fabulous gretchen!]
first name: Gretchen
age: 35
current city: Memphis
living situation: I live in a great historic district neighborhood on a very friendly street in Midtown Memphis, with my 6 year old son and my husband.
occupation: Director of International Training, Fortune 500 hotel company
how do you structure your time and space? Well, this has evolved over time for us. After my son was born, I took 13 weeks of maternity leave. I went back to work full-time, but was able to work from home two days a week, and my husband stayed home with our son the other three days a week. At the time, we lived in DC and good day care was ruinously expensive. Plus, I think that first year really created a bond between my son and husband that you don’t always see between fathers and infants. After the first week of my husband’s frantic phone calls that included words like, “Um honey, he already ate all the breast milk in the fridge and it is noon, now what do I do?” he figured it out pretty quickly and has been a great hands-on dad ever since!
We moved to Memphis when our son was one, and for two years I worked part-time on a contract basis and had a really flexible schedule, meaning I basically worked during nap time and in the evenings. And, once a week, I had a college sitter come to the house to babysit while I worked upstairs.
I was offered my dream job two years ago. I work from home most of the time but travel five days out of every month. And, sometimes, I travel internationally for more than a week at a time. Honestly, I couldn’t do this job without my husband’s support. I pretty much walk out the door on Monday morning and come home Friday and the family runs without me while I’m gone. I don’t even plan meals for them anymore. It’s almost like what I envision it would be like to be a man!
As for the “rest” of life (cooking, cleaning, laundry, et cetera), I’m not as organized as I’d like to be. We end up ordering out often, and I will confess that on more than one occasion, I have sent my son to school in the “least dirty” uniform pants I could find because I hadn’t done laundry soon enough. But, if I’m having a hectic day at work and my choices are to spend some time with my son before bedtime or cook dinner, I’ll always choose to spend time with him. If I have to choose between doing laundry or hanging out with my husband after the kiddo is in bed, I’ll usually choose husband time (unless we are all down to our last pair of pants!)
using the metaphor of seasons to describe the phases of women’s lives,
-what are the particular challenges and highlights of your current season? Working from home, I’m constantly having to draw and redraw the boundaries between work and the rest of my life. While I try to make my schedule flexible so I can be involved in school events and all the other things that go with having a young child, I still have a job that has to get done in a professional manner.
On the other hand, working from home has afforded me an opportunity to really strike a happy balance between my career and my family. I love my career and I have worked very hard to get where I am. But, I also don’t want to miss out on raising my son.
The biggest challenge for me, personally, is that after I’m finished working 40+ hours, taking care of “life,” and spending time with my son and husband, there often isn’t very much time left for my own personal pursuits. I figure I’ll catch up on all of those books I want to read when my son becomes a teenager and doesn’t want to hang out with me anymore!
-What season(s) preceded this one? A move and the evolution of my current career/family balance.
-What season(s) might your future hold? I guess I’ll see where the journey takes us. My company is based in DC and sometimes the topic of moving my family back there arises. If they offered me a promotion to a job I really wanted, I would seriously consider moving. I love Memphis, but I also have worked long and hard to get where I am. I spent a few years on the “mommy track” but now that I’m back to working on a “career track” and getting recognized professionally, it would be hard for me to turn down that next step on the career ladder. However, it would have to be a decision that was right for our entire family and not just me.
favorite family activities: We love to travel, and our son has been to Europe as well as to many places across the U.S. Closer to home. My son and I have a date to the Downtown Farmer’s Market (which he calls the party farmer’s market) every Saturday when it is open. That is one of my very favorite things to do with him while my husband takes that time to sleep in or read a book. We also enjoy going down to the Greenbelt Park in Harbor Town to ride bikes.
favorite solo activities: yoga, reading, cooking for relaxation and not because dinner needs to be on the table in 20 minutes. I’m also a newly contributing blogger at http://meldabbles.com/ on “green living.”
sources of inspiration: my husband and son; the little messages on my Yogi tea bags; yoga
best MakeShift moment: I don’t know that I have just one MakeShift moment. My entire life feels like a MakeShift moment some days! My best moments are those when I can see through the chaos and recognize that work won’t fall apart because I sneak out to have ice cream after school with my son, or that my son won’t be scarred for life because I had to miss his birthday last year due to a work meeting (whether I may be scarred for life is still in question). My best MakeShift moments are when I can take the time and find the clarity to realize how VERY, very lucky I am and appreciate it.
gretchen is the author of “it’s easy being green,” a regular blog column in which she offers some of her favorite ways to increase environmentally-conscious family living. check it out her introductory post at http://meldabbles.com/2010/03/29/announcement-2-its-easy-being-green/#comment-100.
Tags: career track, fathers, green living, gretchen, meldabbles, mommy track
