living situation: I live with my husband of four years and our daughters – Christina (3), Rebecca (1 year, 9 months), and Allison (5 months). (These are, of course, their online secret identities, but the names are close enough.) We bought a house five years ago before we married, and wound up with one much bigger than we’d planned. Luckily, it turns out we were able to fill it pretty quickly.

occupation: In addition to being a manager, wife, and mom, I am a full-time attorney, doing primarily transactional and non-adversarial work.

how do you structure your time and space? I do this in pretty much the same way working fathers have for many years. I returned to work quickly (six to seven weeks) after my children were born, and I have a nine to five job with a commute. Though lawyers often work long hours, I leave at five and manage the work by bringing much of it home to do after my girls are in bed. 

My girls all go to the same day care near our house, in a small town. We’ve never had a single problem with the center, and the kids love it. Our oldest is getting a preschool curriculum there now. My husband works slightly earlier hours than me, and is able to pick them up and bring them home each day.

I’m not cut out to be a stay-at-home-mom. I need to be on the go. One of the things our marriage depends on is a certain equality – we both work to support the family, and we both parent. Though those roles are different at different times, we take them relatively equally (except that he doesn’t have to carry a breast pump wherever he goes, which is totally not fair).

using the metaphor of seasons to describe the phases of women’s lives,

-what are the particular challenges and highlights of your current season? The biggest challenge is that I’m very tired all the time. When there’s too much to do, sleep is sacrificed. I’d compare it to the holiday season — it’s run run run, all the time. There is so much to do and so little time, and I’m always working on a clock and a to-do list. However, it’s also just full of fun, and happiness, and sparkles, and candy, and hugs. Every time I come home feeling like I’ve been hit by a bus and thinking about all I have to accomplish that night, I get tackled and swarmed by two toddlers who just want to love on me, and I hear baby giggles. My husband pulls dinner (which I made the night before) out of the oven, and all is right with the world. 

-What season(s) preceded this one? Our previous season began when my husband and I, after six years together, finally grew up and put things in order. I moved to be near him in 2004, we bought a house and got engaged in 2005, got married in 2006, and then were pregnant within 2 months. 

-What season(s) might your future hold? I’m hoping more of the same, though with a bit more sleep.  I wouldn’t mind the pace slowing as the girls get more independent and need my help less. I’ll be glad to fill any extra time with sleep and things I want to do for myself, and I’m looking forward to knowing my girls as people instead of babies. I think I’ll get to see a little more of the old, pre-kid me, and I’m looking forward, ironically enough, to sharing that person with the kids.

favorite family activity/activities: I love Friday nights, when we make chicken fingers and watch movies to celebrate the start of the weekend. My husband and I drink a couple of beers, the girls rocket around the room and beg for “dark sauce” (teriyaki) for their chicken, and then everyone collapses. I can’t wait until they’re old enough to help pick a movie that we can all enjoy. (Well, I did enjoy “The Princess and the Frog”… the first ten times!) 

I also love giving the girls bubble baths. We have a huge garden tub, and have never owned a baby tub. I just bring them in with me, taking turns. We use high-end bath products, and I condition their hair and let them use sparkle lotion. My girls ALWAYS smell great! 

favorite solo activities: more bubble baths, but alone; blogging; reading sci-fi and fantasy novels; the lore and novels of the World of Warcraft, a game my husband loves; keeping up with old friends on Facebook; dreaming of hobbies I wish I had. 

sources of inspiration: I’ve been searching for a Everything Role Model for a while now – a woman with a professional career who worked while her children were babies, has a stable marriage and three or more kids, and who still looks good and manages to sleep once in a while. I can’t find her. 

So instead I get inspired by my mom, who does a million things and looks great while doing them; my father, who taught me about work ethic; my husband, who can take anything in stride, even being mobbed by toddlers; my boss, who is what we call a Zen Master; and my paralegal, who never stops smiling and has enthusiasm for everything. I just need to surround myself with positive people, and positive things will keep happening.  

best MakeShift moment: When my youngest was a month old, she had a case of the sniffles and a cough, which turned into a respiratory arrest in the emergency room. She spent six days on a respirator in the pediatric intensive care unit at the children’s hospital and four more days in a regular room being weaned off oxygen. (Her official diagnosis was non-RSV bronchiolitis — basically, a bad baby virus).  

I had two toddlers at home 40 minutes from the hospital, a very sick new baby, the responsibility of pumping to keep up the milk supply until she could nurse again, terrible cold weather, plans to work from home on maternity leave, and the holidays to contend with. This could have really sucked. 

Instead, it wasn’t so bad. After the arrest, I was just so on top of the world that Allison was alive and going to be okay that nothing else seemed to matter. So that Alison wouldn’t have to be alone, my  husband and I trucked the older girls to and from the hospital in their pajamas while we switched out shifts. The situation was rough on them, so we did whatever it took to keep them happy, including letting them wear tutus everywhere.

I spent almost every night in a chair at Allison’s bedside (including New Years’ Eve), pumping every two hours and holding her hand every time the hospital staff had to do something to her. My work assistant brought me boxes of files for review so I’d have a productive way to spend time (and earn money) while I just played the waiting game. My husband and I changed out clothes and phone chargers and toiletries and hardly saw one another for a week and a half, except in the parking lot of the hospital. 

And it was really okay. We just camped out and powered on through, and Allison came home alert, healthy, and a pound and a half heavier than when she’d gone in. (If you did nothing but sleep for a week and have food pumped into you, wouldn’t you gain weight too?) 

[check out www.highheeledmom.com for more  of lindsey’s musings on motherhood and life.]

first name: Cyndi

age: 40

first name: Jaime

age: 32

current city:  Collierville, TN

living situation: We live in a suburb of Memphis, in a small neighborhood with many families. Our household consists of my husband, two sons, ages three and 16 months, and two Yorkies. And all our names start with J’s (even the dogs).

occupation: Registered Nurse

how do you structure your time and space? The beauty of my job is that I get to choose my schedule. It has taken about a year to figure out a schedule that gives us a good balance. I work three days a week, two shifts of 12 hours and one shift of eight hours. We have one weekend day together as a family, and three weekday evenings. One weekday evening is deemed mine to go out with friends or attend small group at my church. My husband also has an evening of his own. We don’t always use our “solo evenings,” but they are there if we want them.

Our daily schedule is a hodgepodge. With two kids on different nap schedules, someone is always asleep, which leaves little time for errands away from the house. I try to give the boys one-on-one time when one of them is asleep. And I involve my three year old with chores, i.e. laundry, unloading the dishwasher, and picking up. We recently hired someone to clean the house twice a month, as I prefer to spend more time with the boys. Also, I pick up toys one time a day, at night after the boys go to bed. Before, I found myself constantly picking up toys! So if you come to our house, expect toys on the floor. It maintains my sanity and allows for more play time with the kids!

We also use e-mealz.com for our meal planning. Meal planning was a big issue for us and this has made it much easier. Now we know exactly what is for dinner, and either of us can cook the meal, since the recipes are easy and already planned!

Our childcare situation is a great one. Two days a week, both boys attend Mother’s Day Out from 9 a.m. to 2:30 p.m. These are days I do not work, so I run errands and do some things for me. The boys love it. We chose the days I work in order to keep the boys out of daycare. On Fridays, I work an evening shift, and my husband comes home early so I may leave for work. I also work Sundays when he is home. Then Mondays, our next door neighbor watches the boys until my husband gets home. 

using the metaphor of seasons to describe the phases of women’s lives,

-what are the particular challenges and highlights of your current season? I am truly seeking a life of balance between being a working mom and a stay-at-home mom. All the while, I fight the urge to be super mom. Because I work weekends, I feel like I actually have two work weeks in one — my four days of staying home, and my three days of work. I try not to cram too much into the four days I am home in favor of fun activities for the kids and me. Some weeks I succeed in balancing, some weeks I don’t. The three days I work seem to run by in a blur and I miss the kids terribly. But work also serves as a break from that part of my life. That may sound horrible, but I enjoy my job and I look forward to working. (No, did she really say that? Yes, she did). I also enjoy the adult interaction (well, mostly adult — the occasional immature patient ruins that image) and the absence of phrases such as, “Please stop hitting your brother,” and “We do not pee on other people.” Although to be honest, I have said the last one to a patient! 

-what season(s) preceded this one? My preceding season was a mix (summer to winter).  It started with a dream job filled with five star resorts and celebrities and ended with a period of grief and clarity. I lost my father, got married, and finally figured out I was called to be a nurse, which necessitated my return to school. This season revolved around soul-searching and self-discovery, and it ended in the surprise that we were expecting our first child!  This news urged us to restructure our couple-centered and career-centered life into an existence that would nurture a little one.

-what season(s) might your future hold? Once the kids are both in school, I will shift my work schedule to coincide with school, which will allow for even more family time. I also look forward to returning to golf on a regular basis, and even playing as a family. I see a future with four golf bags in the car, and the family headed to a golf destination for vacations. I am also considering returning to school to become a Nurse Practitioner. So I see spring coming in the future, a season of the blooming of seeds that have been planted in our current season.

favorite family activities: Going to the zoo (the zoo pass offers a tenfold return on the money invested), the park and the water park in the summer. We also recently joined a gym that has family activities and swimming. We have ventured to the driving range a few times with the boys and are hoping that becomes a favorite activity as they get older.

favorite solo activities: Yoga, blogging about work and home , and exercise. I would love to get back into knitting and painting unfinished wood (like rocking horses and stools).

sources of inspiration: People who are honest, real, and not afraid to admit their faults; Moms who blog; My dad.

best MakeShift moment: Showering does not happen before the kids get up, so I have a cabinet in the bathroom designated for them. In it are toys, a roll of garbage bags (that has been re-rolled MANY times) and an hourglass filled with colored water. All of these things entertain the J Brothers. Also, my older son loves his telephone, so he sets up his office in our jacuzzi tub and conducts business while I get ready for the day. I guess you could call it “Take Your Mommy to Work!”

And from my babysitting days, I once watched six children under the age of five. They were all fighting over toys, so I finally took all the toys with wheels (about ten), tied them into a “train” and pulled the train all over the house with a parade of children following. They were entertained for an hour and peace was kept until their parents returned.

find jaime on the web at www.nursegolfdiva.blogspot.com.

[i couldn’t help myself. jaime was my college roommate, and the last two pictures are evidence of the best random dormatory pairing in the history of higher education.]